Selfish or Selfless: Caring for the Elderly

You know them and just maybe you think of them once in a while. They are alive, or one of them still is. They raised you until you were weaned, helped develop your character, encouraged, and supported you, until you left the house. Or just maybe they didn’t; they were heartless, life sucking, and you…

Losing You

Walking away is the best I can do as you cry yourself to sleep at 4:42pm. For all you know it’s morning, as you have the last few months at this time. You are confused, but you don’t know why, you are incorrigible, nothing will help the situation, thus is the reason I must step…

Half Awake

I lay here in my dark bedroom listening to the sound of water, when metal shower curtain hooks scrap across a metal shower bar pulling me straight out of my dream state. Immediately, all I could say out loud in a whiny voice was, “Nooohoho!” It’s 3am…dementia is awake. It has no concept of time,…

Becoming Someone Else: a fading memory

I wish sometimes I had a little camera on my glasses so I can visually show my parents the situation when I explain it to them later than 4:30am.  I faintly hear my voice in the dark surrounding my dream state. In a panic, I open my sleepy eyelids and wait for sound to break…

Where Does She Go?

I sit with my grandmother often, a ready hand when she’s in need. I am a safe place when she is lonely, a conversation techie when questions arise, a chef satisfying her taste buds, a hugger in confusion, and an encourager of her independence. At 99-years old, she’s lived longest in this home, raised a…

A Deeper Kind of Relief

Your voice is faint, calling me from the bathroom. I can only imagine what you want or need from the privacy of the throne. I open the door and peek my head in to find you straining to push out a poop baby from your anus. My rescue brain goes quick into action bringing you…